Teach Your Children Well

In no way do I want to undermine the work being done by brave Rhode Island parents to prevent the government or its schools from cutting out parents from decisions that affect the children. 

But message to parents: initiate the tough conversations with your kids yourselves! 

Are you telling me your transconfused rebellious child or teen is leaving NO EVIDENCE for you? Do you really need the SCHOOL to tell you the different clothes, hairstyles, moodiness, language and deportment, and other in-your-face evidence are more than "just a phase" and signs of a serious treatable problem? 

Maybe it is just a phase! I understand that's what you hope. 

But in this environment of rampant transgender contagion where all of a sudden all kids wonder if they are queer and school libraries are dispensing how-to-queer manuals like candy at Halloween, do NOT let the schools take your power, and do NOT think the schools will give you an inch. Do it yourself without the schools. 

You already know this: the consequences for letting others be the ones listening to and advising your troubled kids and encouraging their delusions have never been higher and more dangerous. 

Take care of your kids, be grateful for good and caring teachers, but be vigilant and fight to lawfully remove the predators from schools. The predators (more and more of them) are there with wide, warm smiles, hoping you cannot see them in the crowd.

 

Postscript

Actively support your ethically- and morally-centered, common sense local, state, and national legislators who introduce bills to:

1. Move pornographic materials from school shelves to adult sections of public libraries. This is NOT book-banning, but responsible management of resources, assuring age-appropriate restriction and access. Related note: cartoon illustration DOES NOT mean material is appropriate for children.

2. Prevent chemical or surgical sexual alteration of minors. Prescribing cross-sex hormones, puberty blocking drugs, and / or performing life-altering disfiguring surgeries on minor children for cosmetic purposes causes irreversible harm. Mentally tilted adults advocate for such mutilation under the deceitful guise of compassion. Leave minor children alone and most will outgrow their confusion.

Some Fitting Advice

Does this make me look fat? 

Once upon a time, when someone asked you a question, you were expected to answer honestly. Now? Political correctness: a prevalent form of coercive speech modification to compensate for distorted hypersensitivity (my definition).

 

... My feet hurt from walking on all these eggshells...

What, now I can't tell the truth? Then why do you ask me? Because you want me to be an accomplice in your delusion? What about sound judgment? What about rational thinking? Objective reality? TRUTH? 

You: Does this make me look fat?  

Me: Yes. Return it to the store and buy something that fits. 

There. Simple, direct, and honest.

But in the millisecond it takes to envision the look of horror on your face if I really say that, I've already started rummaging through my mental card file of politically correct and sensitive alternatives.

Politically-Correct Me (completely avoiding a direct answer to your direct question): "You know, I really like that black number you wore last week. You look great in it. Why don't you try that?" 

That works. You waddle off and change your clothes. 

Besides being dishonest, all this hedging and spin seems so… counterproductive. What good does it really do? You will continue to buy those slinky size 6s and stretch them over your size 14 body unless someone has the courage to suggest you start browsing a little farther up the boutique racks. 

Yikes – look at teenage girls. I suppose I should be glad they have such a positive body self-image, especially considering eating disorders and anorexia. But don't they have a full-length mirror in the house? How about a real BFF with a brain and common sense to share? 

Orange-peel jelly belly below a crop top. Saddlebags and thunder thighs crammed into skinny jeans. Maybe what they have is a fun-house mirror - the kind that distorts the image to be something it isn't. Something it definitely isn't. 

Even slender girls seem to have those mandatory "love handles" (don't get me started on THAT euphemism) hanging over the top of their pants. Why? What are they thinking? 

Oh. I guess they're not thinking.

  

Hellllllloooooooo, it's not called a 'muffin top' because it's yummy. It's overflow. Too much crammed into too small a space. 

Now, I have nothing against a size 14 body, don't get me wrong. In fact, one of the most beautiful women I've ever known was a shapely size 14. She just knew the secret: she wore clothes that FIT. I think women of all sizes are so much more beautiful when they do. 

Who cares about the size number? I don't wear the size tags hanging out of my clothes, and I noticed you don't either. 

So be real, be "fit," and be really beautiful. : ) 

The beautiful "Walking on Eggshells" image is used with permission from the artist (c)2009 bonniebythebay

A Mother's Axioms

The marvel of life is that it is a journey of continuous opportunities for learning, many times from the most unlikely sources. I am amazed at the education I have received from my four children. Each is unique in his (three) and her (one) approach, but their lessons have not failed to elucidate. Often, the lessons seem to contradict my long-held beliefs. However, their wisdom is worth sharing. Here is a sampling of the new axioms:

If you leave the empty ice cube tray on the counter, it will refill itself. 

The wallpaper looks much better when loose seams are torn away.
 
Painted woodwork makes an excellent drawing surface.
 
Toilets are not meant to be flushed unless the equivalent of a roll and a half of toilet tissue has been used.
 
Bedtime is a suggestion.
 
A drink of water tastes best when drunk out of a fresh glass each time.
 
Doors close best when slammed.
 
All chairs are rocking chairs.
 
Beds make the best trampolines.

Spills needn't be wiped up; they evaporate with time.

Chore time exists to renew fascination with neglected toys.

Blowing on the tops of furniture works as well as using a dust cloth.

The family room must be constantly maintained at a moderate level of mess to be considered comfortable.

For every toy that is put away, two must be taken out.

Clothes are more accessible if left on the floor.

Church services produce the irrepressible urge to poke at siblings sitting next to you.

Following hours of after-school silence, the day's routine activities must be discussed at bedtime.

The later the hour, the greater the desire for a bedtime story.

If at first you don't get permission, cry, cry again.

Announcing "Bedtime!" elicits hunger and thirst.

Always leave one square of toilet tissue on the roll. It's the considerate thing to do.

Light switches are made to be turned on. And left on.

A napkin is always within arms reach. It's called a sleeve.

Books without pictures beg for crayon illustration.

WHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED FROM YOUR CHILDREN? : )

Children: Spun Sugar or Clay?

The pervasive politically correct, bleeding heart, liberal mindset insists we treat our children like brittle spun sugar dolls that should be handled as little as possible. We don’t want to hurt their feeeeeelings. Don’t want to damage their self-esteeeeeem.

I say it’s our parental obligation to view our kids as beautiful globs of clay instead. Particularly in the first five years of life before we are obligated to turn them over to the liberal cesspool of the education system.

While our children are young, we parents need to grab ‘em with both hands and shape, smooth, tool, twist, blend, taper, and craft for all we (and they) are worth. That means loving and nurturing them by drawing clear lines between acceptable and unacceptable behavior. Tempering privileges with discipline. Saying no, and following through. Saying yes, and following through.

Clothes, food, and a roof are not enough. Toys, TV, video games, and summer camps do not compensate. Get your hands dirty. Feel the clay goosh between your fingers.

Kids are open and curious. And they constantly test the limits. Not because they want to aggravate us, but because they need to understand what is OK and what’s not OK. They’re learning about the world – their world – and we parents must embrace our responsibility as their teachers. If we neglect that duty, our little sponges will absorb whatever liquid knowledge leaks their way. And we may not like the results. Too many clueless parents do not take charge of what goes in, and then despair over their child’s unruly and defiant behavior. Children may be individuals, but they need guidance to shape their values and behavior to function properly in society. That’s your job, Mom. That’s your duty, Dad.

Our consistency is among the most important gifts we can give our young children. And it doesn’t cost any money, just thought and time.

Nothing is more unsettling to a child than to be able to do something without reprisal today, and be berated for it tomorrow. Worse, get in the habit of doing something over a period of time, only to have Mom or Dad blow their top about it much later. It breeds confusion. Fear and uncertainty.

Strict parenting does not damage a child’s self-esteem; weak parenting does.

Consider this when your two-year-old bundle of self-centered "me-me-me" impulses does something that’s “so cute”: will it still be so cute when she does it as a four-year-old? No? Nip it in the bud when she’s two and you won’t have to deal with it when she’s four.

True self-esteem and self-confidence are not built by having every urge indulged. That pattern is just an artificial prop. Self-esteem and self-confidence are actually developed from having those urges trained properly. If the only things our children experience are impulse indulgence and praise for mediocrity because we are afraid to offend them, they will surely crack and crumble like spun sugar when life’s hammer falls.

(written May 5, 2007)